Howdy do! I'm new to the Weekend Writing Warriors, a list of authors showcasing their work for all and sundry, on Sundays. I used to be part of Six Sentence Sunday and now that it has ended, wanted a new place to post snippets. So here I am.Today, I'm offering a snippet from my work in progress, a cross-over paranormal romantic suspense with BDSM elements, entitled Second Chance Succubus. In last week's snippet, Lady Aislynn saw the twin werewolves come in. This is the same scene from CSI Chayse's perspective, and Chayse hates succubae with a capital H.
“Come on, let’s
get this over with,” Chayse grumbled. He didn’t want to return to the strip
club again, but his brother insisted it was the only way they’d get any real
answers.
Nik pushed past
him and stood for a moment to let his eyes adjust after the searing brightness
of the Las Vegas summer outside. Chayse scented the succubus’ approach as the
sounds of slender heels ripping at the carpeted floor reached his ears.
Just like she’ll rip your heart out and bleed you
dry.
“Welcome,
gentlemen.” Her voice spread a balm over every hurt in his soul, promising
comfort and understanding, and he felt his brother’s tension relax.
Chayse kept his
eyes on her boobs to keep from being snared by her seductive gaze.
That's a pretty good excuse for looking at her breasts. ;) There are several great authors on the Weekend Writing Warrior list and a few of my favorites are Sarah Ballance, Paula Martin, Goran Zidar, and Gem Sivad. Thank you all for stopping by and happy reading! :)
Definitely a good reason to stare at someone's chest :)
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure about the tenses you are using at the start: I think you need a "had" between brother and insisted. Other than that, I really like it.
Great tension!
ReplyDeleteThe different reactions from the two brothers is interesting. I was amused that you managed to find a good reason for a guy to stare at a woman's breasts!
ReplyDeleteHmmm, so in order to keep from meeting her seductive gaze Chayse focuses on her breasts? I don't think his strategy will work. *snicker*
ReplyDeleteOh, so THAT'S why guys look there when we're talking to them. Ha ha
ReplyDelete~Joyce Scarbrough
*laff* Great way to end, I love that excuse! I suppose there's even some truth in it :D
ReplyDeleteCould I make a suggestion? I don't think heels make any sound on carpets so many substitute something like polished marble floor?
I really like your description of the effect her voice has on the guys.
Lol. You paint them so well with their actions here :)
ReplyDeleteGreat reason to stare at a gal's chest. lol I loved this line: "Her voice spread a balm over every hurt in his soul..." Great 8.
ReplyDeleteThe tension you show here is captivating and you made me giggle too. He honestly thinks he has a great excuse to look at her chest, amazing. :D I really enjoyed this. More please.
ReplyDeleteMixed emotions for Chayse. Scary situation. I loved the soothing balm over every hurt in his soul. A wounded man. Yum.
ReplyDeleteLove your descriptions, Siobhan! Particularly enjoyed this line: 'Her voice spread a balm over every hurt in his soul, promising comfort and understanding' - I'll definitely be back for more next Sunday! :)
ReplyDeleteExcellent snippet! I'm looking forward to reading this!
ReplyDeleteLove that excuse LOL! Definitely an interesting situation for them to be in.
ReplyDeleteA man will use any excuse to look at boobs... her eyes are up a little higher lads. :-)
ReplyDeleteWow, she's some seductive lady! I enjoyed the peek into your hero's thoughts...great excerpt, leaves me wanting more for sure.
ReplyDeleteHmm ... sounds like she's got him well and truly snared. Great job Siobhan!
ReplyDeleteHe thinks he has a great reason to stare at her chest? LOL.
ReplyDeleteLMAO! The "Her voice spread a balm" sentence is insanely fabulous, and then you hit with the boobs. SO funny!
ReplyDeleteWerewolves as cops? Interesting.
ReplyDeleteI like how he thinks her boobs are less seducing than her gaze!
ReplyDeleteWoho, she's dangerous! And they're in for trouble!
ReplyDeleteThat is the best justification I've ever heard of for a man's eyes staying buried in cleavage!
ReplyDeleteLOL! Laura took the comment right outta my, er, fingers. The boobs are gonna save him?!
ReplyDeleteThis is an awesome snippet! I loved this: "...as the sounds of slender heels ripping at the carpeted floor reached his ears.
ReplyDeleteJust like she’ll rip your heart out and bleed you dry."
Nice! :-)